A Play by Play of the Cursed Move

Everyone wants to know how the move is going, so here's a peek into how horrible it's been:

Two Months Before the Move
Four and a half people (the half is my sister who spent half her time on our couch) and two dogs in one apartment = home feels like a messy disorganized kennel where we're all tiptoing around each other and can't get any peace.

One Month Before the Move
Decide it's time to move to a place with a yard, for our sake and for the dogs. We nab the first apartment we see in Park Slope. Hooray!

Two Weeks Before the Move
Landlord we've amicably lived with for three years suddenly goes crazy town shady in the dealings with my sister and roommates about whether they can take over our lease.

One Week Before the Move
We find out the move is delayed by six days. At this point we are all at the end of our rope, so six days feels like forever. Plus now instead of moving on a Saturday when my boyfriend and his dad can take charge, we'll now be hiring movers to move on a Thursday when I'll be home alone and have to deal with it all myself. Also around this time, Spencer (one of our dogs) bites the landlord, which doesn't help our roommates' dealings with him.

Few Days Before the Move
While my boyfriend is busy working 15 hour days, I'm having constant freakouts about how I'm going to finish packing in time all on my own.

Moving Day: 11:30 am
Movers arrive early. Friend who is supposed to help with dogs has not arrived yet. I need to get the dogs out of the way so Spencer doesn't bite the movers. Not knowing what else to do, I put the dogs in my roommates'bedroom unsupervised, knowing that now my roommates will probably hate me.

12:00 pm
The move is going great! All my worries were for naught. The movers are supernice and really quick at moving and wrapping everything. They didn't even care that I had two times as much stuff as I predicted.

12:30 pm
Friend arrives to take the dogs for a walk to get them out of the house for a while so they stop clawing at the bedroom door. But we find that the dogs clawed so much at the knob they somehow locked themselves in the room!

I send friend into midtown to pick up the door key from my sister, who's at work.

1:15 pm
Movers are done packing. I head with them to the new place.

1:45 pm
Friend calls to say he got back to the apartment but none of the keys work! WTF?! Now we have to call an emergency locksmith. Friend waits for locksmith to come.

Meanwhile, I'm on the phone with my boyfriend, who's at the office in the middle of a meeting. He convinces me I should leave the new apartment, where I'm currently supervising the movers, to go to the old apartment to supervise the locksmith and friend opening the door so Spencer don't bite anyone.

Against better judgment, I leave the movers to finish the job and lock the door after them without stealing anything*

2:30 pm
I end up in a cab in traffic with a retarded driver who doesn't know north from south. We've only gone halfway by the time the friend calls to say the locksmith got the door open and that my roommate just got home so she can be the friendly face to let the dogs out. SIGH OF RELIEF!

3:00 pm
Roommate calls to let me know the dogs ravaged her room. I feel bad about the whole situation.

3:45 pm
Roommate calls again, this time to say the landlord threw a sh*tfit and has decided to kick them out and they have six days to find a new place. I feel even worse that my roommates & sister got wrapped up in our streak of bad luck.

9:00 pm
After making another trip to bring the dogs to the new apartment, I head on an errand to pick up a kitchen cart I found on craigslist. The cart is too big to fit in my car. I head back home emptyhanded.

Day 2: 6:00 am
My boyfriend gets up early for an important client meeting at work. He goes to take a shower and the shower knob falls off in his hand. No shower for him.

7:00 am - 10:00 pm
I have a busy day of unpacking, supervising the plumber to fix the showerhead, making copies of the keys, dropping off the laundry, doing a huge grocery shop, and making one more trip to move the rest of our stuff. I am finally feeling relieved and happy that we're getting settled and our lives back on track.

10:45 pm
I both get home ready to finish unloading the stuff in the car and relax. But get inside to find that the puppy Milo has his head stuck in the backyard door wrought-iron security gate. Can it get any worse?

10:45 pm - 12:00 midnight
We call 911 at least 10 times and wait more than an hour for the police to arrive to help.

12:45 am
After two hours of waiting and sitting uncomfortably on the ground stroking Milo over and over to keep him calm and from hurting himself, the cops find their bolt cutter to cut open the gate. Milo is free and fine! SIGH OF RELIEF

Day 3: 11:00 am
Boyfriend takes his morning shower and finds that the shower still isn't working properly.

And that's where we're currently at.

Please lord, make the bad things stop. Thank you and Amen.

Now I'm going to have my first shower and proper meal since Tuesday.

*I think the movers may have accidentally taken (stolen?) our power drill while I was out, but that's not so bad in the scheme of things.